How Not to Let Your Child Fall Behind This Summer

With the end of another school year, you may be feeling part relief (at having made it through another school year) and part anxious (how will my child possibly remember what he’s learned?). Or your reality might be one of the following: 

1. Your child transferred in the middle of the school year and was just making friends. 

2. Your child has an Individualized Education Program (IEP) and didn’t qualify for Extended School Year (ESY) services. 

3. Your child had extra help all year just to catch up and you’re worried being on break for 3 months will cause him to fall behind again. 

4. Your child was bullied this school year and you’re a nervous wreck about what to do for next year. 

5. Your child has Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) and doesn’t handle the new school year well. 

6. Your child puts up a fight each time you try to get them to practice their reading, math, or writing, so they’re not behind when the school year starts. 

These are just some of the scenarios that multiple families go through each summer. I’m not a parent myself quite yet, but I can imagine (and sometimes hear about) how hard it is. There are several parents out there that truly care about their child’s education. But, they may be feeling stuck between wanting their kids to have a fun and relaxing summer and wanting them to upkeep what they have learned. Plus, in several families both parents have to work, which makes it especially hard to make sure they get the practice that they need. Not to mention the guilt parents probably feel about not spending enough time with their children already. Not to be a Debbie downer, but when talking about summer this way, it’s hard not to feel stress, anxiety, or nervousness about such a long break. But, of course we have some ideas to make it better! Or else this title would be a big fat lie. 

Here’s our list of ideas: 

1. Take advantage of free programs provided by your local library, community center, community groups on facebook, metroparks, etc! 

There are so many free programs out there! You just might have to do some digging. Facebook has been a great place for us to find resources and programs for our families to participate in that are free and within a decent driving distance. We’re near the Northeast Ohio area (most commonly known as Cedar Point). So we have a ton going on in the summer time! Winter is a different story we’re going to save for another time. These programs are for a variety of ages and usually last between 1-3 hours, unless a day event is going on, such as a festival! Let’s be honest, you’re probably on facebook anyway (no shame, we all are!), take the chance to look up some programs and activities that could boost your child’s learning and help them make new friends! 

2. Participate in RTS Summer Camps 

Of course we’re going to include ours in the list! Resilience Therapy Services (RTS) is located in Sandusky, Ohio near downtown! Where we host all of our camps in person! Our camps focus on socialization, math, reading, science, creativity, and movement. We’re also hosting our first full day camp on Put in Bay this summer on Saturday July 18! Where kids will participate in fun and educational activities, get to take some goodies home, enjoy a nice lunch, and  make new friends, while the parents can have their day of fun around the island! To register or learn more, call or text 419-656-3053! 

3. Set a regular routine 

This is to especially help your child get ready for the new school year (when that time inevitably comes!). But, this can also help your child kinda stay in the structured, productive routine that they had to get used to during the school year. This doesn’t have to be the exact same schedule as the school, make adjustments based on your families summer lifestyle. Which brings me to my next point, this will look very different for every family. But, just to provide an example I’m going to base this off of stereotypes and sweeping generalizations from the students I’ve personally worked with. I don’t have children of my own yet, and I have no idea how anyone of you are living your lives or what you’re going through. Please use this example as a template to give you a starting point, not the entire, complete roadmap you must follow to a T. 

I’m basing this example off of this made up scenario: 

• Mom and dad work full time 

• Kids have a babysitter come to the house M-F from 7:30-5:30 

• 1 child is a middle school boy that plays video games all of the time 

• 1 child is a 3rd grade girl that loves to play and be active 

Here’s my example: 

Tuesdays:

8 AM - babysitter wakes up kids 

8:30 AM- kids eat breakfast 

9:00 AM - kids and babysitter go for morning walk around the neighborhood 

10:00 AM- kids each complete 2 worksheets based on an area of need (this can also be read 4 chapters in a book, etc) 

12:00 PM- kids eat lunch (no TV or video games, this will make it harder for them to regain their focus) 

1:oo PM- babysitter does science experiment with them (or do 2 more worksheets, or read 4 more chapters) 

2:00 PM- kids free time until parents come home 

Now, this is just an example. Structured, yes. Effective for everyone? Maybe not. The biggest thing with this schedule is the babysitter's ability to actually do things with the kids, not just sit around on their phone all day. You pay them for a reason, they can do a little something (even just 1 day a week) to help you and help your kids. I’m not saying there’s not one babysitter out there that doesn’t do this already, but most people can be lazy when given the chance and nothing to do (because what do we all do when there’s nothing to do?- We grab our phones.) Also, I created this example for this schedule to run only on Tuesdays. This really helps kids accept it, and know that they still have a ton of free time to enjoy their summer doing what they want. You could have the schedule build up as well, it can start with one day a week for an hour, then two hours the next week, until you have a whole day of structured activity for them one day a week or you can stretch it to 2 or even 4 days/week. You know your family best. But also know, you will get push back from your kids if you try this with them. So be prepared to explain to them (in a way they’ll understand) the reason why you want them to try this, how good it will be for them, how it will make going to school easier, how good they’ll feel when it’s done. If it’s better for them and you, you could even do the “school work” stuff outside of the house, maybe at a coffee shop or the library. So they can have that transition activity (getting in the car, driving to the place, going into the place) that is a little similar to going to school. This will signal to their brain that it’s time to switch gears. Plus, being physically away from the video games, toys, etc will really help them focus and learn that once they do what they need to do, they can do what they want to do (just like in the working world). 

4. Use what worked during the school year 

Think about what has worked for your child(ren) during the school year and use some of them during the summer. If visual schedules worked really well for your child, then create one (or use an app) and use it at home! The icons can be broad, such as “first work, then break”. Or they can be specific “first reading a book, then watch TV”. Maybe your child’s jam is waking up early, then use that to make a schedule for them to do something helpful in the morning. Something else that might have been working for your children during the school year that they might not have even noticed is being rewarded for their work. If you want your child to do chores and your reward for them is a clean house or “putting a roof over their heads” may not be effective for a child because they can’t fully comprehend what that means. They don’t pay bills or have a job that makes money, so they aren’t aware of the great gift of living for free under someone’s roof. If you’re going to use this system, use rewards for them that actually feel like a reward to them, and it might surprise you! I remember absolutely loving when my parents would play a simple board game with my brother and I. Their reward could be a game night where they choose a game. It could be picking a movie for family movie night. It could be getting to spend the day with mom or dad, just you two. Rewards don’t always have to be candy, money, or a new toy. 

5. Be the Mean Parent 

What I mean by this is, it’s ok to be the parent that tells their child to do something that they don’t want to do. If he needs help with reading because he’s reading below grade level and you sign him up for a free program at the library to get free, private practice, you’re not a mean parent for making him go. Even if the famous, “I hate you” gets repeatedly shouted all the way there. 30 minutes, heck even an hour, of reading won’t kill them. They may say it does, or they may make themselves feel like it does, but it doesn’t. And honestly, this isn’t saying to be the “mean parent” everyday. You can still really help your child by making them doing the hard thing just once a week. Also, remember the reward system mentioned earlier? Use that if that works for your child! And, explain to them that helping them read now will save them potential embarrassment (by others or self inflicted), time, and energy for them in the future. If they practice whatever it is they need to now, they’ll have more time in the future to do things they want rather than doing the practice then. They won’t feel insecure, ashamed, or embarrassed being one of the few kids that can’t read at school. They won’t waste energy worrying about the teacher calling on them to read in front of the class. Explain to them how this is going to help them. It will also help to, to tell them about something you weren’t great with in school, whether that be reading, math, science, history, playing in band, stuttering, etc. Show your kids that you had issues, just like they do, and that you did the work to pull through them. 

The most important thing about this part is, you need to stay strong. Don’t give in when they give you a hard time, or if you’re tired, or if you are too frustrated. Kids are smart, they know what buttons to push to get what they want. You are a strong parent and can do this. Do this for the future of your child, yes that one that’s fighting you right now, but do this for her. So things are easier for her in the future. This is also why it’s a good idea to start small, just one tutoring session a week, just 4 chapters/week, etc. You can do this! And you child can too. 

I hope any of these suggestions work for you and your family! They are definitely not a one-size-fits all, but they may at least get the ball rolling! You are a good parent. Don’t tell yourself anything less. Yes, you made mistakes (didn’t your parents?), all parents make mistakes! No one is a pro at this. You care and love your child. If you didn’t you wouldn’t have read this whole thing, or bothered googling how to help them in the first place. Give yourself some credit! Also, you don’t have to start any of these tomorrow. Think about them, keep in them in mind and work on how to incorporate it into your family's summer life. 

Stay strong, you’ve got this!